Sunday, March 10, 2019

31, TN, United States

Haven’t had a job in over a year at this point, it’s temp stuff. If I just had a job where I was organizing things in one form or another, behind the scenes, maybe alternating with data entry, it wouldn’t be entirely likeable, but it’d feel fulfilling. But I’d really want something more creative in nature, more my aptitude and stimulating, rather than repetitive

Some people would be surprise to know that I did karate and tai chi, though I only got to maybe 5th rank out of the 10 before black belt and not sure there was ever intended to be ranks for tai chi, more health and such

My biggest accomplishments thus far is probably a tie between managing my money well enough to still have roughly $1500 in my bank account or more recently trying to get myself out there and keeping regular updates on film reviews, as well as regularly blogging for around 10 years in one form or another

I want those who are not autistic to know that: I would think the major thing is that being autistic doesn’t follow to being inept or somehow an invalid. There are those that have it where such functioning is much harder, like in a similar fashion to an intellectual disability such as Down’s syndrome. But in my experience, far more people with autism in the “high functioning” form that used to be called Asperger’s syndrome have quite fulfilling lives and don’t need to be handled all the same. That we aren’t so utterly dysfunctional that we can’t make our way in society. There are difficulties, certainly, but not to the same degree as dealing with people who have mental illness and such. Being more open to a different perspective doesn’t equal throwing out old ones at all

I want to tell others on the spectrum-
Not sure if I can offer much encouragement, since I personally still feel somewhat trapped in terms of how my diagnosis has seemingly gotten my parents in an attitude that isn’t acknowledging that I need to be a functioning adult apart from them like my brother. But other autistics should know that there are those who will support you and I am with you in spirit as someone who wishes there wasn’t this stigma that paints us as something defective or meant to be controlled. Honestly, if you feel like you’re in a bad spot, always remember that there are others who can empathize, myself included, you’re not alone

Not sure if many resources helped entirely to a point beyond basic things, because it was a time when there was still a different approach to treating it. Also, my own manifestation was different than others, so I think the methods used were not as effective or too coddling, as if my mentality was a child’s when that was around my junior year of high school. Being initially diagnosed with ADHD probably didn’t help either, though I can’t say that the medication that still factors in for similar “symptoms” I take to this day doesn’t help, because it does. Fluvox is used for various other things, I believe, such as OCD, so the benefit is…tangential, I imagine. Haven’t seen a psychologist since college and that was brief anyway compared to a longer stint with a psychologist that I’m not sure practices anymore.

These days, it’s fairly different from over a decade ago when I was diagnosed and the general idea that I understood was that it was just a different way the brain was wired, which is still the dominant model of interpreting autism, I believe.

Signs/symptoms that showed I was autistic: I hear about how I did have borderline obsession to the degree of memorizing Disney films line for line, though there’s likely overlap with other stuff that could fall under such a particular trait. I was fairly outgoing too, not really at all like myself today, but for all intents and purposes, one might’ve just seen me as quirky, but autism wasn’t really well known in the late 80s or 90s compared to 2000s, I think.

When I first received my diagnosis I felt like I had some explanation for my oddness, but it wasn’t like I was handicapped really.

Today how I feel about my diagnosis: I’ve gotten more understanding of how people can still have a damaging perspective on autism in spite of saying they’re trying to be supportive or positive about it

Current obstacles I’m facing: I still haven’t gotten my driver’s license and it’s not as if I don’t want to, it’s more that there isn’t an easy solution because of everyone’s schedules. Or there’s something else going on, I honestly don’t know anymore. If anything, I have more obstacles than most, I feel

1 comment:

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