Sunday, September 15, 2019

I'm 22 and I am from Nottingham, England

I am unemployed and hate it 😅 been desperately searching for work and doing everything I can to find something luck

Something people would be surprise to know about me is that
I have 5 birthmarks but only know where 4 of them are 😂

In my opinion my biggest accomplishments thus far:

That's really hard because I've done a lot I would say orobably the biggest thing that I had to work a long time for would be getting my degree in Psychology with Criminology

How I want to change the world:
I just wish people could be kinder, and I wish I could be kinder to myself. I think too many people have so many harsh ideas about themselves and others that are wrong but if leads to divisions in society and even hatred and it's the cause of a lot of problems. I think if we all just became more accepting of each other and ourselves and was willing to simply keep unkind words left unspoken then everywhere would benefit a lot (like Disney's Thumper said "mama said if you got nothing nice to say, don't say it!")

Resources that have really helped me:
My family 😅 honestly growing up I didn't receive support in terms of note takers and things because academically I'm quite competent so people never thought I could benefit from help (and when they did I was told my grades were too high to warrant supporting 😩🙄). So my family have been my personal and social support and whilst there's been a lot of stress and hard work on both their side and my own...i wouldn't be who I am without them.

Awkward story about me:
One time I was in a game store looking through the ps4 games as I'm a gamer (and was just seeing if they had any deals on any games I might want) and I was in a world of my own debating some games when a store guy BOUNDED up to me and went "everything all right here? Found what your looking for? You look a bit lost!" And as if I was watching this unfold from some other place I heard my mouth suddenly go (before my brain could catch up) "nope I'm fine that's just my face" and afterwards my brain was screaming at the awkwardness but the guy didn't leave after that! No he paused and went "so you looking for something for your partner?" And whilst my brain was at a blank of what to say my mouth took the lead again and went "well considering no partner exists right". I wanted the ground to swallow me up right there and then but apparantly this comment was weird enough to send me. Shop guy away from me at least 😂

Something I want to tell to the rest of the people on the spectrum:

You don't need to see the spectrum as a curse. It isn't some strange evil little gremlin dancing around in your brain looking to see what it can ruin. It is something that gives you a different perspective and skill set from others that are often sought out and NEEDED in the world. When you tell people you have it don't treat it like a dirty secret or shame. Be matter of fact and show that you aren't ashamed by it and they won't be either.

Don't deny yourselves experiences or feelings "because I have autism". You can still grow as a person, learn, love, have families and live with autism. But if you start saying "I can't do that because I have autism" that will stunt you more than the spectrum ever can

Something I wish neurotypicals (those with not autism others) knew about autism:

That we still have a voice and we can use it to talk for ourselves and say what we need or how we want to be treated (even if we may say it in a way that's different from others). A lot of the time they say we "aren't good communicators" but maybe it's just because we're not being given the chance and if we are we're not adhering to THEIR idea of good communication

Signs or signals I am on the spectrum:

How I would watch a person/ group of people to see how they acted and then based my behaviour off of that. My mum saw a lot of signs in my early childhood such as special interests, bluntness, tones of voices and a need to know what was happening and any changes that were well as meltdowns 😅 but people at the time were more focused on my physical problems as I was struggling from another undiagnosed (at the time) condition called Ehlers Danlos syndrome (EDS for short)

How I felt when I was first diagnosed
It was strange because at the time I was 15 and before someone said they wanted me to be referred to look into a diagnosis...i hadn't even thought of it hadn't even considered I could be because I didn't relate to a lot of other people at the time that I knew whom was on the spectrum and whilst I was facing bullies...i didn't consider myself like really different from others

How I feel about my diagnosis today:
It explains a lot now that I know a lot but honestly it doesn't phase me. I'm no stranger to medical things and my conditions are just part of who I am like my brown hair or pale skin and freckles. They're there and parts of me and no one will change them no matter what they may think 😊

Being diagnosed later in life was difficult: when I was quite young because when my mum was trying to explain to schools what I needed and things like that they had a hard time understanding why it was needed (especially since "she's always so we'll behaved!" 🙄😂)

Obstacles I have faced:
Oh boy 😅 I've faced a lot. I've faced medical tests and drawn out processes and waiting times for diagnosis on more than asd (and to this day I have some uncertainty around my eds diagnosis for which TYPE of EDS I have). I faced horrific bullying at school with little to no help from schools I've faced physical struggles of dislocating and joint pain and trying to explain to other young people that "yes I'm young but my joints still hurt so no I'm not going out tonight!" And even struggles nearly leading to eating disorders...And now in trying to fins work and even having hard times in living arrangements which are only just being settled...theres a lot in my life that's been hard. But I've had good times too and love and support all the way so I choose to focus on that

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